Crazy

Quite a few years ago I went to see a psychiatrist.  When he asked why I came to see him, I said, "I think I'm going crazy."  His response was that I wasn't going crazy since crazy people never think they are crazy.  I left his office hugely relieved that I wasn't crazy after all.

It didn't take long before I then realized that since I didn't think I was crazy, I might very well be crazy.  But then I realized that thinking I might be crazy because I thought I wasn't crazy meant that I in fact wasn't crazy because I thought that I might be crazy.

Still later, I started thinking I might be going crazy, which then lead to the idea that I might just be thinking that so that then I could convince myself that I wasn't going crazy because, since I thought I was going crazy, I clearly was not.  Which lead inevitably to think that therefore I was crazy and just playing mind games with myself to convince myself that I wasn't crazy, but since I thought that last bit, I was not crazy.

Well, to cut to the chase, I just want to thank that psychiatrist from decades ago for virtually assuring that I would never be totally convinced of my own sanity, and through doubting my own sanity, I can rest assured that I am, in fact sane.  That is, unless I am only telling myself that I think I may be crazy in order to reaffirm my hope that I am, in fact, not crazy.  Either way, I'm probably okay.  Unless I'm not, that is.